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All That's Fit to Print The big news over the weekend was Hillary Clinton throwing her hat into the 2008 presidential race. If I saw it once, I saw it two dozen times, "breaking news." Yeah, right. If Hillary kept her hat on, sat out the upcoming battle for the White House, now that would be breaking news. The first study of the new year has been released, or it's the first study I stumbled across. It's a doozy. Teens become more materialistic as they grow older. You're kidding. According to the report I read, as children grow older they become more materialistic, which of course means that by the time they are teenagers they really want a lot of stuff. This study was like shooting fish in a barrel. The only people who didn't know teens are materialistic are teens. I'm not sure how much the study cost or who footed the bill, but I'm guessing it was a slow day in the research facility when this topic came up. There is a second study that caught my interest. University of Florida engineering researchers discovered that microwaving a kitchen sponge for two minutes kills almost any germs lurking in the sponge. Now that's a study worth doing. A man from Kazakh was caught trying to smuggle 500 parrots in his Audi. into Uzbekistan. Don't feel bad if you don't know where those places are. I don't either. Some officers in Tijuana, Mexico are using sling shots and ball bearings these days. The police lost their real weapons when the army took them for inspection after speculation that some officers were aiding and abetting drug smugglers. I'm betting those ball bearings hurt. If anyone thinks video games don't influence children, consider the 10-yearold boy who recently stowed away on a plane headed for Texas. The child was desperate to leave the Pacific Northwest to get back to his grandfather in Texas. So, he stole a car and drove to the airport and hid on an airplane. His mother said he learned to drive by playing video games. I'm guessing it might have been "Grand Theft Auto." I could be wrong. And, if parents think schools overreact to students with knives, consider the two Massachusetts students who got into a fight at school last week. The argument escalated and one child was stabbed. That child died. I wonder if they played video games. Last, but certainly not least, marijuana proponents have always said it was safer than alcohol, that driving under the influence of a little weed wasn't nearly as bad as driving drunk. Tell that to the family of the Ozark, Ala., man who died after a woman who was under the influence of marijuana ran over him in a grocery store parking lot and pinned him to the building. I'm sure they would be comforted to know that it might have been worse if the woman had been drinking.
As some newscaster used to say, this was the week that was. Or something like that.
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